It’s important to keep the
sexual connection with your partner strong, sure, but it’s not always easy — especially if you’re in a long-term or long-distance relationship. When you want to spice things up, you could turn to the classic solutions like sending nudes or starting up a freaky sexting conversation, but their impact might lessen if they’re the only items in your sexual toolbox. In these situations, it helps to put the nudes on the back burner and try some… extra creative sexting ideas.
When you think outside the box, it becomes easier (not to mention fun) to
renew the chemistry you and your S.O. have, says Dr. Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, a researcher and sex and relationship expert at Luvbites.co. “It’s good to switch things up because sexting can become monotonous and lose its passionate effects on the receiver,” she tells Bustle. “Sexual chemistry needs to be maintained with excitement, so these practices allow you to introduce more fun and playful energy into your sexual relationship.” These non-traditional practices can include anything from sending hot voice notes to sharing links to lingerie.
Brainstorming creative sexts to send your partner that aren’t nudes can really turn up the heat in your relationship and benefit your connection in the long run. “Sending sexy messages can be very beneficial for couples because it keeps the passionate and
playful energy evolving in the relationship,” says Suwinyattichaiporn, who notes that a lot of long-term couples can begin to experience a lack of passion. “This is one way to prevent such a challenge.” To help get your juices flowing, here are 10 creative sext ideas that’ll bring the heat.
Send A “Lewd”
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If you’re tired of sending the
traditional nude, try leaving a little to your partner’s imagination by sending a “lewd” — aka a suggestive or sexy pic where you’re wearing lingerie or partially covered up by a sheet, bubbles in a bath, etc. A little teaser can go a long way to make them really excited for the next time they’ll see you.
Send A Voice Note During A Self-Pleasure Session
Voice notes are truly an underdog phone feature, so using them when sexting is like a secret weapon. The next time you’re
masturbating, try recording a short voice note of your audible reactions. Give your partner a heads up to wear headphones before sending, and it’s almost guaranteed they’ll go feral for it. Bonus points if you say their name in the recording.
Send Them A Sexual GIF
At times when you know they can’t watch a video or listen to a voice memo, Suwinyattichaiporn recommends sending your S.O. a sexy GIF instead. Twitter has become sort of a free-for-all when it comes to NSFW content, so you can easily find a borderline or full-on pornographic GIF to send to your partner. Pair it with a classic “This can be us if you come over tonight” message.
Leave Them Surprise Nudes To Find Later
If you’re able to sneak in a quick self-timer photoshoot, Suwinyattichaiporn suggests taking nudes on your partner’s phone and hiding them in a folder for later. When you’re apart, text them “Check your hidden photos folder, I left you a little something ;)” and enjoy blowing their mind.
Send A Link To A NSFW Video With Things You Want To Try
When you’re looking to get creative or switch things up in the bedroom,
ethical porn can be a great resource for ideas (and you can get off while you’re at it — a win-win). Warn your partner that the content is NSFW, then send them a link or two of videos you find super hot along with something like, “I keep picturing you doing this to me, and I’m getting so turned on right now. Wanna try it tonight?”
Send An “Innocent” Picture With A Sex Toy In It
Sometimes subtlety can be just as hot as an outright sext, so try sending a normal selfie or picture with a
sex toy noticeably in the frame. Once they notice and mention it, ask them if they want you to use it right now — or if they want to use it on you later.
Send Them Erotica Excerpts
Sean Anthony Eddy/E+/Getty Images
Widely available for free online, erotic short stories can get any literature-lover all worked up, says Suwinyattichaiporn. To start,
Literotica is a massive digital library of free erotica writings. If your partner loves to read (especially spicy books), there’s no doubt you’ll have them flushed and squirming through the rest of their work day.
Send Links To Different Lingerie Options
For a slightly less scandalous option, pick out some
sexy lingerie during your next “add to cart” scroll and send them a few links, asking for your partner’s opinion on which one they like best. Don’t be surprised if your boo immediately orders them for you.
Have Them Download An App Attached To A Remote-Controlled Toy
Especially if you’re trying to keep things spicy in a long-distance relationship, try surprising your S.O. with a
remote-controlled sex toy. Send them a link to the app that connects to your toy with the text, “Download this and give me an orgasm.” You’re welcome.
Set A Sexy Wake-Up Alarm On Their Phone
If you happen to sleep apart, Suwinyattichaiporn shares the idea to blow your partner’s mind first thing in the morning by setting a voice memo of your self-pleasure sounds as their wake-up alarm. Way better than any “good morning” text.
Dr. Tara Suwinyattichaiporn , award-winning researcher and sex/relationship expert at Luvbites.co
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